“Someone here is living with an underage girl! Come quick!” That’s what the neighbours told the police.

My wife and I spent months searching for the perfect flat after getting married. Finally, we found one and took out a mortgage. For a long time, I went there alone to oversee the renovations and manage the builders. My wife visited less often, so I ended up being the one to meet our elderly neighbours across the hall—a sweet old couple. Since we didn’t know anyone else and wanted to celebrate moving in, we decided to invite them over.

Once they sat down and met my wife, something changed in their behaviour. Honestly, it made me a bit uneasy, but my wife distracted me with her gentle kisses and hugs, so I brushed it off. They left in a hurry, though we had no idea why, and we were too happy to dwell on it.

We woke up early the next morning to loud knocking. I knew our new life was off to a rocky start when I saw a constable on the doorstep, eyeing me suspiciously.

“Good morning, I’m the local constable. Here’s my badge. Could you and your *wife* show me your marriage certificate?” he asked. I was stunned by the request but had no choice—I dug through piles of boxes and unpacked clutter.

Ten minutes later, I found it and handed it over. The constable looked back and forth between my wife and the certificate, raised an eyebrow, and said, “Thanks for your cooperation. That’s all I needed to know.”

“Sorry, but what’s this about?”

“We received a report yesterday that an older man was living here with an underage girl—likely under sixteen.”

I burst out laughing. The truth was, my wife was actually a year older than me! I was 22, and she was 23. She was petite with a baby face, and without makeup, her hair in a ponytail like yesterday, she could’ve passed for a schoolgirl. Meanwhile, the stress of sorting out the flat for months had aged me—exhausted and unshaven, I looked like an old man next to her.

Now, I’ll make sure to get some rest and shave properly. No one’s mistaking me for my lovely wife’s uncle again.